Today’s home study was actually at our house. My poor Grandma was very confused when I talked to her on my way home from Tuesday’s home study. She could not understand how I could be on my way home from a home study!
Nikki came over right after work. We gave her a quick tour of the house, fire extinguisher included. She didn’t poke around- no looking in closets or scoping out our bookshelf like I thought she might.
After the tour we settled into the living room to start the questioning. She had told us that while the first visit was more about her telling us information, this one was more about her learning about us. It was actually really fun. We got to tell the story of how we started dating (the only time I’ve ever heard Mark stammer over his words), Mark impressed her with his awesome Excel budget macros (her mouth was literally hanging open), we talked about date nights, fights, and thoughts about discipline, and Mark made me cry when he told her what he loved most about me. It’s not very often that we get to have discussions like this or relive silly old stories like the time we all froze on the hayride on our wedding day. We got sidetracked sometimes and Nikki chimed in with some stories, like the wife who started sharing an example about how she and her husband dealt with times they were annoyed with each other. The wife realized halfway through that the story might not be appropriate for a social worker so she stopped, but then she didn’t want Nikki to think that she was hiding something, so she finished. The offense? Her husband hates it when she tweaks his nipples.
The whole thing was really very simple and lasted about two hours. I thought that we would feel a little more scrutinized during this whole process, but I really haven’t felt that way at all. For example, we completed that 30+ page workbook and discussed it with Nikki, but she didn’t flip through it to see what our answers were or question any of our responses. We just really got the feeling that the agency is not looking for specific answers, but that they want to make sure you understand exactly what you are getting into and what the challenges could be. They want to help you in any way they can and make sure you know what resources are available. We have our final two visits on Monday afternoon. Mark and I will meet with Nikki individually and then our home study interviews will be complete!